Writing exercise

Anyone heard of One Word? You get a single word and 60 seconds to write anything you want about it. Don't think. Just write. Pretty cool.

UPDATE: Another cool writing site here.

UPDATEx2: One sentence stories. Very cool.

New movie

Looking forward to this:

WSOPHOTD

New feature here at Kajagugu Poker. World Series of Poker Hand of the Day. First event, first royal flush:

On a flop of {K-Clubs}{Q-Diamonds}{10-Diamonds}, Greg Raymer bet 2,500 from the small blind, John Juanda raised to 10,000, Raymer re-potted and Juanda called all in for less. Juanda turned up {A-Diamonds}{K-Diamonds} for top pair, a straight draw and the nut flush draw while Raymer tabled {A-Spades}{J-Hearts} for the flopped straight. The turn was the {4-Spades}, but the river was the {J-Diamonds}, making Juanda a royal flush! Juanda raked in the 39,000 pot while Raymer was left with only 11,000.

Shamelessly stolen from PokerNews (if anyone objects, please let me know and I will just have to write it up myself).

Juanda was 75%-25% perflop, but after the flop he was 42%-58%. His odds went all the way down to 23%-73%, before hitting one of his 12 outs. Nice hand, sir!

Fun with Kiwis

Ensuing hilarious table chat with player to my right who folded pre-flop before I jammed:

Dealer: Kajagugu wins the pot (720) with three of a kind, Tens
The kiwi king: dammit
The kiwi king: i had 4 of a kind
Kajagugu: don't be results oriented

More FAIL

I've posted some of the FAIL Blog pics here before, but we can't go through a Friday without some fun:


more funny fail pictures at FAIL Blog

Oh and a video too:



I especially like the bicycle one and the treadmill.

And here's some poker content too. My own personal FAIL/PWNED from last night's Riverchasers:

Oh wow - WWYD?

This is the first hand I played in a 180SNG Turbo on Stars. I had folded every hand until this one and decided to test the waters. Outside of folding pre-flop, how would you play this hand post flop? WWYD?

Click here to view a larger version.

Oh yeah, I signed with PXF and left RPT. Let's see if that makes a difference.

Donkavatar

Cool idea. Check out the blog.

I got lazy. So whichever of these two is easier to use:

Shake Your Moneymaker

You can get on Team Moneymaker at PokerStars for $39. Go read the more about it here. But riddle me this, doesn't it look like Chris just sat on a stack of red chips?

FU UB

This is just stupid. I don't even know where to start. Obviously everyone has heard about the Absolute Poker cheating scandal ad nauseum. And most have probably heard about UlitameB et falling for the same practices (read more in this 2+2 thread if you haven't). Just fess up fools!

I used to play on both sites. Never really liked either of them. I liked the fact that AB would kick out missing players after the first level. I liked the bounty tournaments, SNG waiting lists and alternates on UB. But as far as the level of play and the interfaces, they sucked. I haven't played in either in a long while. Can't remember the last time.

So I find it kind of interesting that Johnny Bax has just become a UB sponsored pro. I am not sure it's true, but from this P5 thread it looks like it might be. Somewhere on the second page Bax chimes in:

Hey All, I have always enjoyed playing at UltimateBet. The interface and the structure are 2nd to none. It is my belief that management is committed to doing the right things on a going forward basis. Thus, I have decided to support them. I will do all I can to ensure the players really like the improved UB.

Bax

So, gg Bax. Way to go and support the site that has been silent about a huge cheating scandal with overwhelming evidence against it. Whatever. People need to make money somehow, I guess.

And speaking of P5, do they still have the Triple Crown? If I remember correctly to win it you have to win a big tourney on PS, FTP and UB all in one week. I think Lucko was trying to get one of those a few weeks ago. Well, if they do, they should be ashamed of themselves.

Winners never cheat. Cheaters never win. Simple cardma, folks.

FU UB. FU in the I.

Poker & Addiction

"You know you play too much poker when you are having such a bad day at Hold 'em that you decide to take a break... and play Omaha…"

I can't say I have encountered much in the realm of personal addictions in my life. Sure, I stayed awake for hours upon hours trying to finish some stupid video game or had a few wild nights. But nothing destructive to myself or my family (unless you count the fact that I weigh way more than I should and not really doing anything about it). I do know of several people around me who have battled some sort of addiction (and I will not go into detail) and know how it has affected the people close to them.

Reading through a lot of the blogs recently, I started thinking about whether or not I was addicted to poker. I enjoy it. I play it. I read about it. I sometimes watch it on TV. But am I actually addicted to playing it?

I went and checked out Gambler's Anonymous and found their 20 Questions page. If you answered 'yes' to seven or more you might be a compulsive gambler. While I did have a few yes answers, I didn't make it to seven. Not even close. I think part of the reason is that I might not consider poker to be gambling. I don't see it as a means to make money. I don't get a huge rush from winning (or losing). I see it more as a competition of skill involving some luck (which might be the gambling side on some level). I don't actually gamble outside of poker. If I even make it to a casino, I am not at all interested in table games unless there's a social aspect associated with playing them.

But going back to those stories of addiction I've been reading lately. Since I really don't know much about addiction I might be way off base here, but wouldn't someone with an addictive personality want to stay away from other stimuli that could lead down the path to a different form of addiction? Does a recovering drug addict drink? Does a recovering alcoholic gamble? Does a recovering gambler want to have sex all the time?

Does a recovering addict need to stay away from other vices? I have no idea. What do you think?

Linden - UIGEA Killer?

I ran across an interesting article where BackgammonMaster's online casino (where you can play games like BlackJack and Poker and not just Online Backgammon) tried to survey their players to see if they would like to play in Linden rather than real world currencies.

Stop! WTF is Linden? Well, it's the virtual money used in Second Life Virtual Worlds. I wouldn't know anything about Second Life, but I hear it's quite popular. You know, for people who have so much in their lives that they require a whole second life to help with the overflow of life.

Anyway, the answer was a resounding NO! Of the 500 non-US players surveyed only 20 knew what Linden was and only 2 said they would consider it. They even offered to convert Linden to a bunch of other currencies that the online casino uses, including Czech Koruna, Danish Kroner, Euro, Hong Kong Dollar, Hungarian Forint, Japanese Yen, New Zealand Dollar, Norwegian Krone, Polish Zloty, Singapore Dollar, Swedish Krona, Swiss Franc, and the South African Rand, but that didn't make a difference.

I wonder what the survey results would have been had it been for US players. I've always thought that one of the UIGEA loopholes would be to use virtual money, like Linden, that can then be used to purchase real money. This would make it quite easy to deposit at these sites as well as withdraw.

Interesting, right?

Kings are still doomed but Presto wins?

I watched the replay of last week's PokerStars Sunday Million and saw the horror that is Cowboys:

KK vs AK - Ace flop.
KK vs AQ - Ace flop.
KK vs QJ - Rivered straight. QJ jammed either in the SB or the button and KK called.
KK vs 99 - Rare no all-in pre and obviously Ace on the flop but also a 9 saved him this time.

You have to watch to believe it. So sick.

So what do you think? Play them cautiously by making sure there is no Ace on the flop?

I also watched the $25K heads-up and saw this fabulous knock-out hand by David Singer, all-in pre flop CALL for a big shove bet by Hastings:

BrainMc's Big Game (with WWYD?)

Went over to play at BrainMc's for the first time ever (you might remember that he plays over at my place all the time and takes our money in the process). We went with a very deep stack and a very slow structure which involved starting at around 4pm and finishing the tourney after about 6-7 hours. We had 13 runners including my neighbor Bobby, Surflexus, WeakPlayer (who's back to posting), ISS Spock (who kept the Wheatie going after it's untimely demise) and a few hood regulars.

Since we started with 250BB (5K stacks and 10/20 blinds) I was going to limp a ton and see what develops. We were also playing 7 and 6 handed on two tables so this was going to get interesting. Seems like everyone had the same idea and we saw a lot of un-opened pots and a lot of early bluffing. I was chipping up a bit with some aggression and positional plays and no premium hands whatsoever.

The first hand I remember of any significance was when either on the button or CO it gets limped to me a couple of times and I see AhKh. I decided to play my first real hands strongly and since we were at the 20/40 level I raised to 250 to thin the field. It folded around to Matt, two to my right and he basically limp-re-raised it to 750. I wasn't sure if he was just getting tired of my aggression or if he was actually holding a strong hand and waiting for someone to raise. I called the extra 500 in position and we saw a 9 high flop with two spades. Matt bet something like 900 and I folded.

WWYD? Questions:
1. Limp with AhKh in position and see a cheap flop or raise to thin the field?
2. Raise, Call or Fold after getting re-raised to 750?
3. Flop action?

I felt good with my decisions there but it pissed me off that I gave back all those chips I had been accumulating.

Anyway, on the the next hand. BrainMc is on my left on the button and I limp with T7o for 40. I didn't notice that he called and just saw the SB fold and the BB check his option. The flop came something like 82J rainbow and since I though I was heads-up with just the BB I bet 60 when he checked the flop. But the BrainMc smooth calls and says something like "I'll see on more". The BB folded and now I was kind of rattled because I didn't intend to play BrainMc heads-up out of position. The turn was a 9s which gave me the second nuts and a second spade on the board. I decided to keep the aggression act and bet 120 into a pot of 260 (20+40+40+40+60+60). To my surprise and delight I got re-raised to 500.

So now it's time for me to try to put him on a hand. The board is Js9s8x2x. Here's the range I put him on: J9s, 98s, AJ, 99, 88, 22 and worst of all QT. I doubt he has JJ because I think he wouldn't limp it behind me pre-flop. He might have some sort of spade draw and is just trying to take it away from me at this point. SO I go ahead and make it a total of 1500. He thinks about for a while and then just flat calls. The river is a third spade.

At this point I kind of froze. we both checked it down and he had Td7d for the chop. I felt terrible that I didn't make a river bet and he felt delighted to get the chop. He said he was definitely not expecting me to show T7o for the chop. So why was I so disappointed? Because I felt like I missed a great opportunity for a value bet / scare card bluff.

If I look back at his hand range then I think he folds to a significant bet unless he has a flush or QT. But really what kind of flush draw would make him stay after a single spade flop? I guess the river spade scared me as well.

WWYD Questions:
4. How would you play the the made straight on the turn?
5. How would you play the river?

The rest of the tournament was pretty uneventful. We combined tables and I was still around my starting stack. No more limping as we were getting pretty high in blind levels by now. I played one AdKd hand where Surf raised to 1200 (3xBB) and I just smooth called in position. BB called as well and I shoved an AsQsXx flop when it was checked to me.

Then came my first mistake. In LP I got TT and raised to when Matt to my right limped for 600 I raised to 2500. He kept saying that there is no need for him to ever raise a pot because I was going to do it for him. Then to my surprise, Mike in the BB shoved for 3800 more. Calling would be for about half my remaining stack at this point. Matt agonized for a while as this would put him all-in and kept staring me down. So at this point I put them both on a big Ace. Matt eventually folded and now it was my decision.

I just couldn't shake off my read that Mike was pushing with a big Ace and I was going to have to win a race here. I guess I could consider an overpair, but it just felt like a scared shove. I felt that he didn't want a call and was just trying to squeeze from the BB with his big Ace. So I called. He had QQ.

WWYD Question:
6. What would you do at this point?

That brought me down to shove or fold mode and I was a bit steamed at myself for not being able to let go of that hand. Thinking about it now, this is one of my biggest holes online. So it came up and bit me in the butt live too.

Anyway, another Mike open shoved UTG and I felt he had a small pair and was desperate so I called with As8s and he showed 88 to finish me off. That was a mistake too. I just got impatient and I was still steaming from the TT vs QQ hand.

Let me know in the comments how you would have played those 3 situations. I am very interested to hear.

And thanks again to BrainMc for hosting!

Can Kings Actually Win? (2/180)

Played one more of the $12 180-SNG turbos on Stars and took second. Down to 3 handed I have the chip lead, get shoved on, look down at Kings and know I'm doomed:



JackAce is gold:



Managed to keep it together and made it to heads up with 5BB and a 4.5-to-1 chip deficit. Shoved 2nd hand with Q8s and ran into AQ. Second place is still a nice payday:

Even more baseball

Eric got some awesome tickets to last night's (Mets vs) Braves game so we went for a double date with our wives. Started the night off by dropping KajaKid at their house for a sleepover and then met up at STATS, which is a pretty cool downtown sports bar on the more upscale side. While eating dinner we see that we are actually in a weather delay since there is a tornado warning for the entire area and we are getting dumped on pretty seriously.

That was actually good for us since we didn't have to rush to the stadium or stand around waiting for the game to start. We got there a few minutes after the first pitch and quickly made our way to row 7 behind home plate. Nice!

It's so nice to watch the game up close like this. You hear everything and feel like you are right in the action. We had some fan behind us who kept cracking the best one-liners all night. I couldn't understand half of what he said but it was still funny. For example, he yelled at one of the Mets players that he lived in a three stacked bag of Doritos. What does that even mean? Then at the top of the 9th, when Ryan Church stepped up to the plate he yelled at him that he's so bad, he doesn't even go to church. I guess it was funnier if you were there. And had a few beers.

Speaking of Ryan Church, he took a nasty knee to the head on the final play of the game:



So I am batting 1000 at Braves games so far. Not a bad way to start my baseball watching career.

What is this?

Can someone tell me what this blog is about?

http://galenrbpraven.wordpress.com/

I got some Google Alert with a link to it and I have no idea what it's about. At first I thought it was some strange translation of another blog, but that doesn't seem to be the case. Then I thought it might be some sort of SEO trick, but it doesn't seem to be the case either.

Any ideas?

Ummmm.....

Sometimes poker can be very hard. Sometimes you just don't know what the best move is. Sometimes, you don't know whether you should call, fold or raise. And by how much. You are left in a state of quandary. What should I do, you may ask yourself. What's the best move?

These situations usually happen when you play a certain form of poker. I am happy to present the brand spanking new Texas Hold'um (this is a real photo I took today, I swear):



And if this is too much for anyone to handle, you can relax and play some Keno with an old Chinese man instead:



Please people, be careful out there...

Book Report

So I'm done reading Gus Hansen's 'Every Hand Revealed' book. It's a very quick read. Here are my thoughts (if anyone cares):

1) I already mentioned it earlier, but there is no major shake-up or some sort of earth shattering strategy here. He plays loose early with a big stack and once he gets a big stack going he is very aggressive. I guess it would have been more interesting to see how he handles the opposite situation of playing with a short stack at some point.

2) This is very much ABC poker. There is no in depth discussion and level 8 thinking. He talks a bit about the gap concept, a little about "M", a little about how much to raise against a short stack and a little about the ladder concept. I was a little surprised by this, but I think it makes sense once you think about it. It's a big field, he knows very few of the people he is playing with and they all think they know him. So he has his image of being "a madman" on his side and can exploit weaker players who don't give him credit or try to bluff him.

3) He gets lucky. No real big revelation here either. You have to get lucky to win a big tournament. But it's astonishing to see how many times his junk hands end up with trips.

4) Nobody really puts him to the test. In his tournament summary he states that he won 55 hands uncontested and another 15 pre-flop when he re-raised an initial raiser. His c-bet percentage is almost 80%, which is in line with his aggressive style. Also, a lot of players made awful mistakes to gift him their stacks.

5) He doesn't slow play and he rarely bluffs. But he is a calling station and will defend his blinds with almost any two cards.

6) He makes a lot of mistakes and confesses them all in his post play analysis.

7) The book is written like a diary or maybe even a blog. I guess that's the style in which it was meant to be presented, since he recorded all his comment on a little recorder after each hand. That's why it makes for such a quick and easy read.

Overall, I enjoyed the book but was still a little disappointed that there wasn't more meat in it. You would think that a top pro, with so much success would have more to say. But maybe that's the point. Maybe this should be my biggest take-away: Poker is not as complex as some people might think. If you break it down to simple goals, don't get too fancy and don't overthink situations, you can succeed.

I would recommend this book to anyone who wants to see what it's like being in the head of a loose aggressive player sitting on a big stack in a major tournament. Then again, you can just go to lucko's blog and read his tourney recaps and get the same value.

Anyone in the neighborhood interested in borrowing it, let me know.

O'Reilly Meltdown Follow-up (UPDATE)

So the originals have been pulled by CBS (UPDATE: you can now find them easily), but of course he won't be able to erase it completely. Then Colbert picks it up and then you have this:



And since I obviously don't come up with all this stuff on my own, here are two great sources for this sort of thing:

World of Isaac

Mac Gs World

UPDATE: Here's a Dance Remix of the clip. Pretty awesome:

More baseball

If you recall, I went to my first baseball game a couple of weekends ago. So I wouldn't say I am a "fan" yet. But then I cam e across something that is truly spectacular. Manny Ramirez makes a great catch by the wall, jumps up the wall to high-five a fan in the stands and THEN throws to first for a double play!

You have to see it to believe it. Here's the link.

This sucks

I was checking out my FTP rakeback and saw that it was negative. I sent support a question and this is the response I got:

You have $xx.xx in tournament overlay deductions. These come from either Iron Man, freerolls or playing in MTT's that had overlay. They deduct your share of the overlay from your MGR which created a negative rakeback.

Well that's just stupid. I have to pay for their overlays and freerolls from my rakeback? How does that make any sense? They promote a guarantee and when they can't fulfill it, they take my hard earned rakeback to pay for the overlay?

Bad joke

I heard this one and probably can't even tell it right:

Farmer catches a brown chicken trying to have sex with a brown cow. When he can finally speak, what does he say?

Brown Chicken, Brown Cow !!! (Say it fast a few times until you get it).

Kind of reminds me of that character from Arrested Development (TV show not band) that was called Bob Loblaw played by Scott Baio. I think he had a blog, too: The Bob Loblaw Law Blog.

Slow news day here.

Stumble

OK, so here's an interesting question. Has anyone used StubleUpon? I remember hearing about it somewhere and it seemed like another time killer to me. But yesterday I saw that a lot of readers came from there, so I tried to figure out some more. I couldn't get anywhere within the actual site. So....

Is it useful?
How can I find the source of my Stumble?
Is there a way to actually do a smart search?
Is it completely random?

So if you have any experience with it, let me know. Gracias!

Kings can kiss my ass!

I played some poker last night and while I am happy with some of the results, I can't seem to win with Kings in late stages of tournaments. I don't slow play them. I just get idiot big stacks to commit and hit.

KK vs 99 - no good
KK vs AJo - all-in pre and obviously Ace on the flop
KK vs J9s - flop QT8

On the other hand, some people will just gift you their chips any chance they get. So I have that going for me.

If you're not playing the $12 Double Shootouts to the Sunday Million on PokerStars you are missing out on some easy money. I won another one of these and bubbled another when my set of 7s got checked down and the board made a four card straight. Nice.

I also played the Heads-Up tourney at 23:45pm on Full Tilt Poker and made it through 3 opponents and all the way to 20th of 256 for a little cash. Obviously my opponent could not lay down KK on a AAx flop and hits his 2 outer on the river. Is that how it's supposed to work?

In the 28K, as I mentioned above I ran my Kings into a big stack's JackAce. Made the money, but nothing significant.

I have to admit a couple of things:

1) Reading Gus Hansen's book made me play like a complete idiot. I now understand how some people play against me and at this point it takes a lot of the "skill" out of the game. In some cases it worked, in others not. I need to see how I want to proceed with this LAG strategy.

2) When I did get a stack I was just brutally killing the table. If it folded to me I was raising with ATC and if I had a decent hand and the pot was opened I either jammed or called. I played the 300 FTP point 6-max that awards top 6 with a $75 token and when down to 12 I had more than double my next opponent's stack. Then I doubled a smaller stack with Kings against Nines all in pre. Then I doubled another guy when I flopped top two and he hit bottom set of Twos. Then someone made a move with QTs against my AK and made two pair on the turn and river to send me out in 8th.

I love poker. I had a bunch of screenshots, but this post ended up being too depressing anyway.

Why I hate chat sessions

I think I have mentioned here before how I detest online chat sessions for support. I always think that it will be the easiest way to get a quick answer and I am almost always wrong. I have no idea how many screens these chat agents have in front of them, but if a 14 year old girl can send 5000 text messages from her cell phone every day, then these agents should be able to handle a few simple questions pronto.

So here's the latest:

Thank you for visiting Register.com's Live Support. How can I help you?
Kaja: how much is a single .com domain cost?
Kaja: how many chat screens do you have open right now?
Kaja: why did I even bother?
Shane P.: Hello Kaja.
Kaja: sheesh - I almost went to work for you guys 8 years ago
Kaja: how much is a single .com domain cost?
Shane P.: The normal price for domain name registration is $ 35.00/year
Shane P.: For how many years do you wish to register this domain name?
Kaja: ok then that's 350% more than godaddy
Kaja: so i guess the answer would be no
Kaja: thanks
Kaja: disconnected
Shane P.: disconnected

So you can now find me at www.KajaguguPoker.com courtesy of Google (Blogger) and GoDaddy.

Suck on that Register.bomb!

Engrish & FailBlog

This is probably old news to many of you but I just had to share these two sites.

First off is Engrish.com which pokes fun at some of the hilarious translations found in Asia for common everyday English. Here are two examples:




Then you have the awesome Fail Blog:


You can thank me later for killing workforce productivity.

Online Identity Theft? Really?

Have you ever felt uncomfortable about having an online identity? Have you ever thought someone was pretending to be you? Has it been at an online backgammon or blackjack site? Well I got news for you - it only happens to famous people.

I got an interesting press release with the following title:
"Popular Blackjack and Poker Game Sites on Alert for Identity Theft"

So that go my curiosity going and I went ahead an read the piece. Turns out it all started when some dude called Fouad Mourtada was sentenced to three years in jail by the Moroccan government for opening a false Facebook profile in the name of the Moroccan Prince, Moulay Rachid. So BackgammonMasters ran a security check on their users and found bogus accounts for Prince William, Madonna and Tom Cruise. I know Tom Cruise plays there all the time, because he keeps trying to recruit me to his Scientologist cult. And he keeps losing all the time too.

Anyway, these types of usernames are called “gold usernames”. Some examples are backgammonking, pokerking, blackjack-king and celebrity names which are just as popular. I wonder if that's the reason FTP flags all these kinds of names and highlights them in red. Hmmmmm....

So here's a fun little Facebook identity mismatch story for everyone. I recently found out that a bunch of my old high school buddies are on this time drain and I reluctantly signed up. Then one day I get a message from someone asking me what years I spent in NYC. I have no idea who this person is but I reply and this is her response:

zomg, (xxx)?

me (xxx) (;
(prison was hell ;)

I couldn't stop laughing. Then I saw the picture:



I'm still laughing.

Be careful out there people!

Gus Hansen Revealed

So a few posts ago I said I was going to buy Gus Hansen's new book 'Every Hand Revealed' where he basically chronicles every hand he played when he won the Aussie Millions back in 2007. Then a few days ago I wrote a post called Gus Shmus about how he lost the WPT Championship going into heads-up with over a 5-to-1 lead in chips.

So I got the book on Friday and it's a very easy read. I will probably have a full review when I am done in a couple of days. But my first observation is this: I don't see anything special. I mean, sure, he plays very loose. And he makes some really strange calls. But his main strategy is to see a lot of cheap flops early on and then when he has a big stack, abuse the table.

I've seen this done before several times. Antes kick in and the big stack just starts to hammer the table with raises. My problem is not, how to do that but rather how to play against that. You don't always get in position to bully the table with your stack. How do you stand up to the bully?

The answer is obvious, you have to re-steal.

Anyway, here's a great clip of Gus calling an all-in with ten high. Antonio is completely shocked and just doesn't "get it". My guess is that gus had a read about a small pair and felt he was racing with his suited one-gapper ten-high. It worked:

Bill O'Reilly is Tuff Fish? (UPDATED x 2)

UPDATE x 2: The original is working again.

I hope I can find Bill playing poker somewhere and get him on some massive tilt. It would be so much fun. I would probably pee myself in the process. Just watch him on teleprompter tilt and see what you think:



UPDATE: Yeah, CBS yanked the videos off YouTube. But some people are already remixing it with some German (not really) and Hitler:

Best Doyle'ism and Thank You FTP

I'm catching up on some NBC Heads-Up Championship and laughed my ass off when Doyle, playing against Lindgren, says he's so old he doesn't even buy green bananas. It's almost as good as the time he was on the golf course, flanked by two Vegas girls, says he's so old he goes to bed with milk and cookies. Then he points to the girls and says "this is milk and this is cookies".

Anyway, I decided to donk it up in the BBT3 and it's no time at all before I am sent to the rail. OMG and Al are sitting out to my left, but I can't get a chance to steal their blinds because Cayne, LJ and Puncher keep stealing MY blinds. Eventually it folds to me, I min-raise and take it down. Next hand folded to me and Blinders is in the BB, so I raise 3xBB and take it down. Next hand I do it again and both Blinders and Cayne fold. Then I get dealt KK and I know my night is over.

This is a perfect time to raise again, because now it looks like I am just raising every hand, so both Cayne and LJ defend their blind against my 3xBB. Flop is J87 with two hearts, checked to me, I bet, get re-raised by Cayne, I three bet and he jams. He doesn't flat call with Jacks or a mid pair, so I put him on two hearts so obviously he has T9s and flopped the nuts, cause that's how I run:



Truth is I didn't even think T9 beats me on that flop. I didn't even see it. I must be rusty. Or maybe it's walking on the treadmill while watching Poker on TV and playing will do that to you.

Loretta8 Heads-Up Sunday Tourney Pimpage

Loretta8 has gone ahead and set up a heads-up tourney on FTP next Sunday, May 18th at 9pm EST. $24 buy-in, 64 players max. Tournament password: shovemonkey.

You know you want it.

All you HUC'ers, maybe the next HUC should be a series of these kinds of tourneys?

Google Me

I saw this brilliant film over on Pokerati. Jim Killeen googled himself and set out to find all the other people with the same name. Check it out (it's a full length documentary feature):

I love these videos

I just can't pass up the opportunity to share this:



Thank you cubanlinks!

WPC Final Table Live Broadcast

A while back I wrote about the World Poker Crown event hosted by 888.com and as you might recall the event was played online with thousands of qualifiers and now they have made it to the final table. The final table is being played live in Barcelona starting tomorrow at 10am GMT (which should work out to 3pm EST). You can go to the World Poker Crown site before it starts and vote for who you think is going to win for a chance to win one of 4 WSOP packages.

My vote is for Gijsbert Gerardus Christianus van Doesburg. Or maybe Arjan Hieronymus Johan Patricius Carolus van Bavel will take it down.

Seriously, can you believe people actually have names that long? How much time does it take them to learn to write down their names? Crazy Dutch stoners.

I actually voted for damnDonk. I just liked the name.

The guaranteed prize of the World Poker Crown is $3M so these top ten final tablists will have a lot of money on the line. The event will be played from May 8th to the 10th and broadcast live on television and the Internet. As an added bonus they will be playing it at the amazing Perlada Castle in Barcelona, Spain.

I am so jealous. So hit the site and vote for your favorite and try to nab one of those WSOP seats. Worth a shot, right?

Did you know that Annette_15 has a poker blog?

I don't know if I've mentioned it here before but Annette_15 (who I think is now 19) has a blog. She is sponsored by betfair so the blog is hosted there and is full of great gems. I've written here about some of here amazing feats before. There was a post about how she played the 180 peep SNG on Stars without looking at her hole cards. There was also a post about how she won the $100K guarantee on Stars by beating out 19,999 players.

Anyway, I read her blog pretty regularly and I thought you might all enjoy it as well. I have added it on the right, in the 'blogs I read' section and here's the direct link.

You will find some great tournament summaries as well as strategy posts. Some of them are very simple rules to follow that will hopefully improve your game. And if you're not UIGEA crippled here in the US, you can also get some info on the freerolls she hosts at betfair.

Let me know what you think.

UPDATE: Oh yeah, I almost forgot. She won the first ever WSOPE ME in London last year and broke a bunch of records. She also was runner-up in the EPT Irish Open. She has some wicked poker chops.

Monkey Poker

I've played a little poker over the past weekend and I have come to the conclusion that some of the players on the other side are actual real life monkeys. You know, like the one that almost played in the WSOP. Well, he was technically an ape and not a monkey, but you get the point. You've all had that feeling, right? You know at some level it's true. There's someone breeding monkeys who can click a mouse and play poker. It's true. I'm gathering evidence and when I have enough I will blow this whole story wide open.

The good thing about all this is that I want to play with the monkeys. It takes skill completely out of the equation and leaves just the luck factor in play. And we all know that humans are much luckier than monkeys, right? Didn't some guy called Darwin prove that? Humans are luckier because they don't have to eat ticks off each others' backs any more. And we don't need to live on a mountain in the fog while eating ticks off each others' backs. I think I made my case right there.

So if it's just my luck against some monkey luck, I guess I have an edge. I haven't figured out that edge exactly, but I know it's there. Once I find it and harness it I will be unstoppable. Well, that and the fact that I have to figure out a way to discern between actual monkeys and really stupid humans. That one might be tough but I have a few techniques I can try. The easy one is to try to get them to answer a simple question. If they reply with "oooh oooh aaah aaah", then obviously you're dealing with a monkey. If, on the other hand, you get "stfu mf", you have a dumb human.

Anyway, it's a work in progress.

I have been going deep in a few of these tournaments, though. On Saturday night I managed my first double cash in the Daily Doubles and went out in 50th in one of them when I got too tired to continue playing. Rock Band was calling me from across the room. I also went deep in the $10+1R+1A on Stars. I really love those. FTP has them as well and I also noticed they added shootouts, which now include heads-up tourneys (which are basically shootouts for two players).

Look for a more thorough evaluation and detection technique on Monkey Poker later on.

PS: I just realized my own picture on the top right. Oooh oooh.

Home Game Suckouts

Last Friday KajaWife went out of town for a bachelorette weekend so I invited the neighborhood poker players to come sling some cards and stack some chips. Since they played the week before I and 23skidoo was hosting a game as well, the turnout was a comfortable single table of 11 players. I gave them a choice of a big game or two small ones and we went for the turbos this time.

Actually the structure was not all that bad and I don't think we felt like we had to shove or fold at any point in the game. In the first game I wanted to play tight but got some got cards in good position and had to fold to post-flop aggression several times. Then with the blinds at 100/200 (fourth level) I got Ac4c on the button and when it folded around to me I raised to 550. Both blinds called and we saw a QdQc2c flop. Seemed pretty harmless but then the SB bet out 500 into the 1650 pot. I was getting perfect odds to chase my nut flush one over so I called. The turn was the 5c and the SB bet another 500 into the now 2650 pot. I didn't have much left from the original 3000 starting stack so I shoved my stack in. I had him slightly covered and he called with KcKd. He can only boat up with a King or a Queen, so obviously the river is a Queen. I am deathly short and bust out when I shove A9s into a better hand.

After that I went to play some Rock Band until the second game started. I know I've written here about Guitar Hero a few weeks ago, but last week was KajaWife's birthday and since she doesn't like the guitar game, she asked if we could add the drums. So I got her Rock Band and we love it. The drums are awesome and so much fun to play. The microphone is extremely easy to master and the guitar is much easier to play than Hero although the actual hardware is far inferior. David busted as well and we played until the first game was over.

We started the second game with a few monster suckouts. On the very first hand a few players see a flop of 992. David, sitting to my left bets big and get's min-raised by BrainMc. He calls and the turn is a 7. David is first to act, BrainMc shoves and gets a call. David flips over his cards and says he has trip 9's, but what he doesn't know is that his kicker is actually a 7! He thought all along that it was just a 4. BrainMc flips over A9 for the better trips, but is now trailing badly. Obviously an Ace comes on the river to save BrainMc's ass with a fantastic first-hand-suckout-re-suckout. Everyone was stunned and somehow the idea of amending the rules to let the first hand bustout rebuy came along. On the very next hand, Jeff moves all-in on the turn with trip Kings, 9 kicker against Bryant's trip Kings, Queen kicker and goes on to spike his 9 on the river for the winning boat. We amend the rules again to allow a single rebuy in the first 15 minute level but Bryant is already on tilt from his beloved Celtics losing game 6 to the Hawks and decides to skip the rebuy.

There were a lot of other suckouts in the second game. I actually managed to get a serious stack going, but could not kill the shorties who kept winning races and sucking out against me. I eventually went out in 5th place when BrainMc had AK against my 89 suited.

We had one hand that left a lot of the players shaking their heads and totally had Bobby baffled. We were in the 4th level (100/200) and the table had tightened up significantly. Since I had been playing tight up until then I decided to open it up a bit and steal some blinds. The players behind me were very tight so when I saw Td2d in MP I raised it to 550. Bobby, on the button min-raised me to 1100 and it folded back to me. So with 100+200+550+1100=1950 in the pot and only needing 550 to see a flop I decided to make a loose call. I knew that it was a loose call, but I had enough chips left and I could get away from pretty much any bad flop. But the flop came three diamond, Queen high. I flopped the 4th nuts and I had decide what to do. If I bet out I might get him to fold. If I check he will probably c-bet me on this flop, unless he flopped the nuts. I picked up a few chips to make it look like I was about to bluff at it and then put them back down and checked it. Bobby jammed and I quickly called. No way he's jamming the nuts there. At best he could have AdQx or QQ. Turns out I was almost right and he had AdJc and my hand held to bust him and nearly double up.

Bobby was totally in shock. The following day I had to explain my play to him as he still didn't fully understand it. I asked him what hands he put me on and he said a weak Ace. I explained that a raise with a weak Ace in MP is suicide because any bigger Ace has me dead to three outs. I also explained that by min-raising me pre-flop he was defining his hand and pricing me in for a call. Yes, a loose call, but one I could withstand AND could be extremely profitable if the right flop came.

Another reason I called was the of the junk hands I kept folding I would have hit trips several times had I not folded. I fold a Q7o in EP and see a 774 flop. I even folded a hammer pre-flop when down to 5 handed where the two big stacks had Aces and another big hand only to see a 774 flop again! In the first game I was in the small blind and it got limped to me about 6 ways when I held 84o. Obviously this was an easy call in the early levels and the flop comes 848 for the nut boat. I got paid off by two players on all streets, one of them holding A8.

So another disappointing home game, where I play well and still lose. At least BrainMc won the second game and is back to his old monthly allowance from my neighborhood games. Well played sir.

Home of the Braves

I am obviously no jock. I don't even follow many sports and haven't for a very long time. I used to play golf up until a few years ago, but now my weekends are better spent with my amazing KajaKid, so I don't follow that single-player-dominated-sport any more.

So it was with great enthusiasm that I joined my fellow neighborhood men to celebrate Bryant's birthday with a Braves home game at Turner Field. I have been to two ball games in my entire life and they were both pretty awful. One was in Chicago (White Sox) and it was freezing and the other was for a corporate event in Tampa, where the Devil Rays actually managed to win one.

Atlanta is definitely a baseball city. The Braves are a great team with lots of history and a World Series under their belts. It was a standard home game on a sunny Sunday against the Reds and there were 33,750 people in attendance. I think the stadium seats about 50K, so for just another game I guess that is a great turnout. The atmosphere was very relaxed and it was just fun hanging out with 9 other guys, cracking jokes, having a few beers and watching the game.

I am not a big baseball fan because usually the games are slow and boring and nothing ever happens. So it was great to watch a game that ended with a score of 14-7 for the home team. With about 30 hits! We went to grab some dogs and drinks at the bottom of the second inning when there were no points on the board and by the time we got back the Braves were leading 7-0. So that added to the fun.

I had one beer and released the driver from his duties by volunteering to drive us back home. It was actually pretty hilarious how we got to the stadium. Since nobody wanted to drive we ended up in Tim's mini-van. Just picture 8 grown men (most are over 6 feet tall and a few are over 250 pounds) cramming into an Odyssey. Tim drove us there and we let Bryant sit shotgun since it was his birthday. I ended up in the middle row, middle seat. The guys in the back were cracking up and even helped me raise the head-rest so that it doesn't stick into the middle of my back. Then they found out there were arm-rests and told me I should put those down for added comfort. I tried to get one down and it was a bit of a stretch and then Jeff says: "I'll give you $100 if you can get them both down". BANK! I twisted my body to sit sideways and easily lowered both arm-rests. He should know better than to prop bet me so callously. He tried to get out of it by buying me a $2 bag of peanuts, but I am going to collect!

Anyway, we get to the parking lot and the attendant just can't stop laughing when she sees us roll up in our clown-mobile. I yelled out "we're saving the planet!" but that didn't seem to help matters much.

After I drove us back home we all ended up in Bryant's basement. He finished most of it himself and it is just an adult playground. Amazing bar with built in beer tap, big-ass HD flat screen, Wii, dart board, pool table and another TV by the table. Susana brought down a ton of food and the guys were just having a blast. A great time was certainly had by all.

Dumb Derby

Can someone explain why horse racing is even a sport? Do we have a lot of other sports where a miniature human beats the real athlete with a whip for over 2 minutes non-stop? Do we have another sport where the athletes are pushed beyond their physical limits to the point of exploding hearts, massive brain aneurysms and compound bone fractures? Do we know of other events where the injured athlete is put to death immediately after suffering such injuries?

Sport of kings? I wholly disagree. I see little difference between horse racing, cock fighting, dog fights, bull fights and rodeos. It is a disgusting, inhumane and repulsive "sport". Horses are magnificent animals and this is how we treat them? Repulsive! We as humans should be ashamed. Without horses our evolutionary progress would have been hampered and we would probably still be sitting in mud huts and eating hand-picked berries. And this is how we repay them? We suck!

And you people, parading around in those ridiculous outfits, looking like idiots with your stupid hats and mint juleps can kiss my ass. All that silliness for a 2 minute race? Give me a break. You should all be ashamed of yourselves. You know who you are and you know you are all staring silently into your soulless empty shells deep down inside. Oh and by the way, FUCK YOU!

What an industry we've created around this idiocy though. Legal gambling in any way shape and form. Sportsbooks everywhere. Call in a bet over the phone. Go to the corner OTB and place your bets. Do it on the Internet. Sure. Why not? Any way to make a buck, right? It's what we humans do the best.

So why am I so upset? Some of you might have not turned on a TV yesterday, but I was not one of the lucky ones. I was at a 1-year-old birthday party and ESPN was on. And the whole day was generally a lead-in to the 134th Kentucky Derby. Kentucky should change it's state motto to something like: "We breed 'em, race 'em and kill 'em". Anyway, a full day of programming leading to the final 2-minute race, won by the favorite "Big Brown" (who's jockey is surprisingly sponsored by UPS, the real Big Brown). Yadda yadda yadda, he's won 3 of 3 races in his career leading to yesterday's victory and now there's already talk of a triple crown and who really gives a rat's ass?

The real story is that of the only filly in the field, "Eight Belles". She just came off another win and was not really favored to win. But she ran her heart out and came in second out of 20. And as soon as the race was over she collapsed and never got back up. Why? Well originally the equine ambulances surrounding her thought it was an aneurysm or a heart condition. But then it turns out she broke her two front legs and was euthanized on the spot. I guess that's how it works in this sport. You kill the 2nd place finisher. Blood sport indeed.

Of course, this is a very serious injury and I understand that there was no way to spare her serious pain for the rest of her life if she was somehow to miraculously heal. I understand there was no other option. My gripe is that we even come to this point.

So here is the video of the lead vet being interviewed as the whole thing goes down:



And here he is in the press conference after the race with more details:



And for those who make it this far and actually want to see the footage of her collapsing at the end of the race, here it is (this may be disturbing to some readers):



Be ashamed, humans. Be very ashamed.

Bill O'Reilly is a Nazi?

I find this drop dead funny:



Have a great weekend everyone!